There several myths about relationships that need to be dealt with effectively and honestly. And let me begin by saying that I am totally into the relationship thing. I’m married to my best friend, we laugh, we fuss, we fight, and we make up. All in all we want to see the best in each other but the reality of things is that if I had known some of the things I found out about him after marriage , life could have possibly been blissful. So let’s get started.
1. Marriage/relationships makes you blind to the opposite sex. There nothing more ignorant than a person saying , “I didn’t see him/her.” Yes you will look but you have to make the respectful decision not to lust. Or look twice ( smile)
2. You have to have similar interests in order to make it. No its good to have similar interests and even better when you have one or more than one interest that has nothing to do with your partner.
3. You become one…no you are two different individuals with the same last name . You have to learn to think on the same page which may take several months to accomplish.
4. Marriage can make a bad relationship better. Nope it will make it worse and will leave you in a bad place.
5. I will wait on my , “Boaz,” and he will be a provider. Hmmm I’m sure I will return to this one but one thing you women have to remember, all men are different and if you were independent when he met you why would you want to revert?
6. My life will be complete once I meet my mate. If your life is not complete now it will only get worse after marriage because you’ll lose yourself being so consumed in , married life.
7. The first 2 years of your marriage is guaranteed to be successful bc you are in love…hmm I don’t have enough time to talk about that. LOVE, ok
8. You don’t marry the family you marry the individual. When you get married you marry that person , the family, goldfish and the dog. You may not invite them over, they are not in everyday conversation but the moment you say one wrong thing about the family including the dog or the gold fish…you will realize you did marry the family.
9. I’m looking for my Ruth…her name is Ranisha and she’s not that virtuous woman that you desired bc she’s 22 and has no idea what direction she wants her life to go into. Don’t rush it.
10. Living together before marriage can show rather or not I should be with this person for life or not! No that just allows you to realize that marriage is not for you !
11. Communication is in the form of talking. Nope not the truth , sometimes you have to listen and care. Actions are always louder.
12. I will figure out my career once I find a man/woman . No figure that out before bc a relationship will only complicate or delay things if you are not focused or career minded.
13. Its ok to have friends of the opposite sex…see my above statement…I married my best friend .
14. Do things differently from couples around you … don’t take advice from no one. Look on those who has had successful before you. It will bless you !
15. Back to Boaz…he was just one person although I teach all young girls to wait until He finds you and that is what is most important. His name may not be Boaz but its most important that you wait till he finds you.
16. Being single means telling it and showing it all the time. The biggest mistake singles is make is broadcasting it constantly. After so long you have created a fictitious person and you are no longer single you are currently dating an imaginary man. And no man in his right mind would want to fit into your fantasy.
17. Marriage is easier than dating…well once the date is over you go home to your own house ( respectively)and you go to bed in your own bed and you don’t have to talk to the other person until you decided to pick up the phone and you don’t have to see that person…all the time. So enjoy the dating process. Get to know yourself as well as the person you are dating.
18. Social media will not affect my relationship. Unless you are married 40 years and have proven yourself as a trustworthy person then yea I can see it not affecting you. But early in a relationship, social media will affect things. Its ok not to post everything. Its ok not to post anything. Its none of our business anyway. And always, always be wise in adding and commenting it will make or break a relationship.