From the time I was a little kid until I was a young adult I was taught the importance of what it means to be a friend. My mother would always instill in me the importance it was to show kindness to others, she would say you never know, one day you may need the person that you are mistreating .  And of course as a child I kind of listened but the understanding wasn’t really there. Also having grown up as a Pastor’s daughter I had to learn how to be friendly and sometimes in that case it was harder to just want to be nice.

I met my first best friend in church. We were close in age and she made me laugh. Not only did she bring me a lot of joy to me with her infectious laugh  , she being 2 months older than me , often gave me instructions on how to play games or just how to have fun.  She was the only person I remember spending the night at her house and one of the only person that I wanted to stay at my house . I met my second best friend in middle school. After meeting in a class we became inseparable.  I thought that we would end up going to college together and even living in an apartment together during college. But in  high school we went from being best friends to just being acquaintances. My last best friend that I have ever had , we met in high school in a biology class. She seemed like a breath of fresh air.  Even though I had two other very best friends she seemed like the one that I had the most in common with. There were times that we even dressed alike and didn’t even plan it . We would buy the same clothes, we had the same taste in music and we had uncommon passion for life and living life. It was nothing for us to wake up early and enjoy the sunrise as we headed to our favorite breakfast spot for chicken and biscuits. I felt like we were destined to be lifelong friends. And who would ever tear apart such a great friendship.

But just like the others before her, one day we just weren’t as close anymore. I remember that one day I just moved on . I didn’t break any bridges and never spoke ill of her we just weren’t close anymore. A few months after I left for college. I got caught up in myself and the things that I was doing that just for a moment I forgot what a great relationship we had  . Later on  I would often think about the emptiness that I would feel when there was not a person that share what was going on with my life. No one that I could pour details into and no one that could share with me or feel compassion for me or that I could feel compassion for or hear about the details of their life and laugh. Yeah I met other people and from time to time I felt close to some of those people but I always struggled with what it really meant to be a best friend.  And I questioned myself asking can I be a friend again?Have you ever thought of what it really means to be a best friend?

I think we often use the word best and friend together without really defining or living up to the definition of what a best friend is. I think that everyone is placed in your life for a reason and whether or not it’s for a lifetime or for just a moment those spaces of time where you call someone your friend should be the time that show the most kindness, loyalty and trust. Integrity is a key to being a great friend. Friendship comes without competition , or jealousy.

Friendship is a two-way street. If I help you out with your problems, listen to me and help me out as well. If I hold a secret  for you , hold a secret for me and show the same kindness that was shown toward you . Take the time to appreciate the people who you have in your life. Remember that you have to give and be able to receive.  Friends are few and far between so open up your heart and embrace a great friendship! Just so you know my best friend from high school and I still speak and talk at least 3 times a month , we may not be best friends but we remain good friends.

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