Currently I’m sitting inside a funeral of one our family members. She was loved by several and the family is definitely mourning. We will miss her dearly. Its a sad occasion but I cannot let this moment pass without me reflecting on life and it’s responsibility.
I stayed up late reflecting on my life. I thought of the good choices I’ve made and bad choices I’ve made. In all of my choices I’ve made I realize that they have been consequential and degregational and most of all regretful . Unfortunately , very few have given me great joy. And if I feel that way about myself, how do I expect others to think any differently of me..
I spent several nights reflecting on my past and how I have affected others by the choices that I’ve made. How much of my life choices is reflective on the choices that others have made? See there is a responsibility to life and it affects everything and just about everyone.
I traveled down memory lane and followed my life down my facebook timeline (lol) . You can learn a lot about yourself that way. I looked at my status updates, the news articles I posted. Was I engaged in life or was I missing the mark.
I reflected back on those guys I dated. I wondered what I was thinking and Why was I so friendly. I cringed, I cried. At points in my life I wasn’t worried about getting married or what others thought I was just wasting time. Ugh.But how did that affect others that looked up to me?
I cannot change the past even though I want to close the window and slam the door to the foolish things I’ve done. I’d love to revisit the good things I’ve done but I cannot. Unfortunately we cannot change things. But with the life I have remaining I can correct those poor choices. I can help those who may be trying to walk down the same path as me. I have a responsibility and so do you.
Loving life Tesha