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Dear Former Youth Member,
I am writing this because I realize this is possibly the only way that communication can happen directly . I am also writing this because this is one way to explain this accurately , without malice and without any interference from any other person . I am sure once this makes its rounds , you will know who I am talking to quickly. I hope that you can receive this in a positive spirit so that you and I can move forward in peace and grace. And if I never get a chance to speak to you again , we can all use this as a reference to what really happened.
I met you when you were 5 years old. I had never met you in my life but the first day I saw you we were fast friends (even though I was about 16) . Over the next few years I watched you grow as a young person. When I first began as a youth leader I had to be very strict because I was only just a few years older than you guys. It was kinda by accident that I became a youth leader. I wanted to do things for the youth that I had not been able to experience as a kid. If you ever know my back story you know that as a child I was mistreated often in church. My entire goal was to be fair because of what I had experience in church . I required so much out of you guys and because of that I felt it my responsibility to offer my best to all of my youth . I taught the word of God , I taught common sense, I gave wisdom and we grew in Grace together . Over the years there have been some youth that I totally fell in love with , my little brother Matthew was a part of my youth group and still he has a special place in my heart, Ashley, Keisha, T’quisa, Tasia, Nene, Raphael, Stacy and Andi just to name a few have a particular spot that is near and dear to me . But you we like an offspring to me .
You were able to share several things with me from your first relationship to some horrible situations you faced as a young person to the college you had chosen to attend .We even talked about what clubs to join . I watched and warned you about every thing that you may encounter even when you could not see it happening. I was there to lead and guide you and if you perhaps chose a different route we never looked at you differently and never treated you differently. When I married my husband in 2010 you were one person that connected to him in ministry and friendship. We talked about graduate school at the school I graduated from , finishing up on your degree, making additional money as you went through college, I asked and begged you to wait to get married because there was so much life to live. You told me the next person you met you were going to marry and we laughed followed by me saying please don’t do that . Please finish up and then get married. You expressed to me about having a family and wanting kids and I responded back that it would happen in time. You came to my house , moved me from House to House…If I called you , you were there to offer help. And when you needed help and you needed to vent and to talk …my 5 babies were put on hold to listen and talk and give you wise counsel when there was a need. Now ask yourself at this moment…who else would do that ?
When you connected in your last relationship I told you something that you remember ( I’m sure you do ) . In true Tesha fashion I shared the same thing with your partner , not one time , not two , but several times. See its not in my spirit to talk badly behind your back , if I have something to say I am able to say those things to your face. In 20 years my integrity cannot be challenge and because I didn’t side with you my integrity should remain the same , whether you agreed with my opinion or not . And when something went wrong in that relationship, even when I wasn’t sure of its truth, I was there to cover you and protect you . All of this and you were not confident in sharing details of what was really going on I still stood for you when nobody else wanted to stand .
The way life works is that people tend to say things , and they circulate, things are left out , things are added but its is until you come to a person directly you will never know the truth . And there are times that people just out right lie. I hate people who have to lie to make themselves or their situations look better . I am still Mrs. Tesha. I still stand behind my principles , I still believe the same thing I believed 20 years ago, 10 years ago, 5 years ago and last week. As a leader and a servant its is not my objective to start trouble or to mislead individuals down a path that may not be the safest for them . Sometimes you have to step outside of the situation to see the bigger picture. Sometimes you have to check the source in most cases its not what you think and in this case its not at all what you think . I will not diminish my character , I will not try to out run a lie , I will not go back and forth . It is your choice to think what you want to think and to believe whatever you will . I am ok with that because that is life and I know my truth . I will remain in the position that I have been given and if ever there is a time that you are able to talk …I’ll be available willing and ready to listen …well Basically
Tesha
