So every year around this time ( my birthday is just 8 days away ) I systematically go through a natural purging . I purge clothes, things that I one enjoyed eating , shoes and then friends. Not that I want to do this every year but sometimes you just have to shake the tree and get rid of the dead leaves. Which brings me to the point of this whole blog and hopefully this will be the last blog this year that I will have to deal with personalities …you’re welcome.
Don’t you hate when people lie to you ? Like really just bold face lies . I don’t know what this time of the year has to do with things but for some reason this is something that I have to always mention something about someone lying . I have to say this year as I enter into a new decade of my life I have decided to call a spade a spade . I have decided to see things as they are and not try to sugar coat anything even if that means having to tell the truth no matter how much or whether or not it hurts someone . The truth is just the truth . It is sad that we would rather listen to a lie than to believe the truth. It is sickening that we would rather be friends with a liar than to be friends with someone who is willing and open to be truthful.
I met this person a few years ago , five years ago to be exact . She was young and she didn’t have many friends and that should have been my first clue about her personality . As the years passed and months flew by it wasn’t too long before the lies began . And as a Christian I gave her the benefit of the doubt and I always walked around with a heart of forgiveness . After all we had just met and she really didn’t have anything to lose by telling my secrets and honestly I didn’t have too much to tell I am a pretty transparent person . But she did , she told the sleeping patterns of my husband and I . She mentioned what I did all day while my husband worked. She talked about my immediate families behaviors and how we acted at dinners and such . She had nothing to gain from telling these things but she did it and because she told one thing that nobody would have known unless they stayed at my house I knew it had to come from her . I forgave her and life moved forward. In the years I found her in small lies here and there , she would usually pass the buck making me think that someone else initiated the lie and she just got stuck in the middle and for the most part I went with it . I have a family and it is very close so if a person tries to come in and come against a family to tear it a part why would you consider to have this person in your life . I have one good friend , my mother is my bestie and my husband is my other friend . Sometimes you need other people to hang out with . So I tried to look over what was said . I have learned that over time that you just don’t invite everyone to your space especially liars.
In the midst of all the lies she started making me doubt my own brother. She had me looking at him like he wasn’t that young man that I grew up with you made me think that maybe he was a liar , a deceiver and a heartless man . But then she wanted to marry him . She wanted to share my last name and she wanted us to be sisters. She wanted to call my parents her parents, she wanted my children to be her nieces and nephews but she just could not seem to ever stop lying . You name an incident and I can tell you what she has told me about it . See in the beginning of the relationship she made me think that she was quiet and never hurt anyone but I soon learned that was a lie because after the first time she lied on me instead of her being a woman and confronting the situation. She sent her family members to stalk me and to talk badly about my parents on social media.
She had a way of doing things , inviting you over to eat and then telling people that we called her and begged her to eat. She told me that she would do certain things but when it came down to it she would go back on her word and make me feel like I needed her to do things for me . But she volunteered . The way she would try to get to us was to buy us , she tried to use her money to buy things that would make us like her . We never asked her for anything , she was willing to do things. The problem I have with this is that she told lies about us asking her for things and that never happened and it will never happen . You can be in a friendship with a person and want so much for a person to be loyal to you that you are willing to overlook some of the most simple things but then there are sometimes you just have to set the record straight . And when you heard that I could not afford to be in a wedding that was a lie too . I didn’t want to be in the wedding because I didn’t want to be in the wedding with someone I could not trust. I believe in integrity and if there is no integrity I am done .
In a lot of cases I have not given my opinion about things when they are faced with life decisions . People generally have to make their own decisions and then everyone else has to deal with the consequences of your choice . But in this case how would you feel if you were in a relationship with a liar?