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I think that every family has that one child that doesn’t complain , never asks for anything . Never requests all of your time and needs the least amount of hugs and kisses from you . In my immediate family my youngest brother was that person . He was born 7 years after me and I was that one kid that was needy. I inherited allergies from my dad, kept a consistent headache and I was just clingy. I Needed constant affection , affirmation , and money for junk I wanted. I wasn’t that spoiled brat that you would imagine me to be but I was pretty close . It didn’t help that I was the only girl in my family , so there was probably some attention that I would have received either way but that’s another story . I may have to correct this story and add my older brother but I’m sure it was my little brother .
In my family that person is my youngest son . I refer to him as the struggle child…why well because sometimes I forget about him so much that he looks out for him self more than its required. It all happened when he was born just 15 months after his premature sister, ( She’s the needy one in my family) we decided to just give birth to him the organic way . Only finding out the due date for his birth and not indulging in sonograms or random testings that don’t help anything while you’re pregnant. I didn’t have a name picked out and we purchased everything in white . I purchased a neutral carrier and went to the hospital with something yellow packed for the child that was coming home with us. We never even called him anything when he was in my womb …just baby.I wasn’t interested in finding out what he was after you had two of each gender its not like we were praying for one or the other …at least I wasn’t . It was a surprised to us that he came out a boy bc somehow I thought he would be a girl . He was an entire boy and I wasn’t that thrilled about the pain I experienced giving birth and really not happy about the fact that he and his sisters were all under 2 years old when he came . This was not my idea of creating a close family . So I was buying diapers in 3 sizes and formula for three different age groups . I didn’t come to terms with his birth till he was about a year old and still I wasn’t just that thrilled about having a boy at the end. It was a tough time for me and I probably faced a little depression after his birth . Thank God for other people coming into my life at the time they did.
I look at him sometimes and I think …why did I get him at the time I got him . Now he’s the only little person in the house with me during the day. Every morning I prepare his breakfast and wait on that moment that his head pops up and immediately says I’m hungry . He sings a few songs while he eats, he’s taught himself how to get on youtube and find his own shows. He learned how to spell his name without much help , he can facetime his big brother while he’s in school, he knows how to call his favorite person and he frequently asks my mother, ” what are you cooking today ?” And still with all of his advances and cute and witty sayings I still forget to buy him clothes and shoes and that one time I noticed him playing with sticks I realized …maybe I should buy him some action figures. Oh yea and then that was the time his brother ran over his bike and then his new bike broke and he was riding his sister’s big bike for like 6 mos because we just weren’t in a hurry to replace his old bike .
You can tell that he is the youngest child because just as my older brother took care of my younger brother, my eldest son takes pretty good care of Port . He also has to answer to a girl gang and one other bigger brother who doesn’t think highly of his little brother . I look at Port some days and think man , its tough being the youngest child. Everyone , I mean everyone tells him what to do . He recently asked for a dog because he wanted someone to tell what to do .
The other Sunday as I was getting the girls ready for church , he gathered himself and put on his own outfit. I didn’t question his choice, I didn’t change his clothes, I just went with it . Don’t get me wrong , I love him dearly, I am proud of what he has grown to be but the timing of his birth threw me off. There is purpose for everything . I thank God daily for his witty words, his random songs and the fact that he never likes any of the food that he is allowed to eat and therefore is forever hungry. I don’t know what the future will bring for us considering he’s just 4 but I pronounce blessings over his life. I pray that he’s forever successful in all he desires .I pray that not one day will we cry over his life’s decisions and that he makes the best of this world and that he will forever make his Dad and I happy.
I pray that he won’t struggle as a black male and will overcome all the obstacles that are presented to he and his brothers. They all will be mighty men of honor and success will proceed , go and follow them We call him the struggle child but his life will never be that of a struggle. He’s the baby of our family and we wouldn’t be complete without him . Struggle no more Portland .
Loving Life,
Basically Tesha
I can identify with a praying mother, as you are, I enjoyed your writing.
Thank you …thank you for reading . Please share and subscribe . We love you always
What a sweet baby boy you have. His independence may surprise you… in years to come, the two of you may have the closest relationship ever.
I sure hope so …thanks for taking the time to read .
Very honest post. I can really lose myself in this type of writing. Thank you for sharing with us all. I know a lot of us can relate to what you shared
Thank you for taking the time to read . Much appreciated.
The independent ones often hold such strength and endurance that builds and releases when you need it most. I have one of those.
Yes I sure hope so …they’re the best .